as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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