he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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