matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
