My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
