Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
her vagine was all disorganized.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
