I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
