sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
