you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
