That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
