I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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