that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
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