awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
