My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
