5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
