that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
She needs sedatives and a leash
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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