yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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