So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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