I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Randomize
