He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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