carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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