Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize
