My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
