Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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