I looked at my own cervix.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
