Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
