Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
