Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize
