There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
