DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
