is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Randomize
