She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
