My brain says no but my pants say off.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
