Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
We don't watch enough power rangers
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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