you mean i was at the winter classic?
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
