So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
