...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
