ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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