i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
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