we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
did i just pee glitter
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
