I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
