If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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