She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
