you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
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