I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Randomize
