Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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