i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize
