I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
