what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
