well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
