We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
